sometimes you have to read between the lines

Childcare worker: "Um, do you have socks for your little boy?" (Translation: 'Poor child, doesn't even have proper footwear!?') Me: "No, he'll slip on the wood floors with socks on..." (Translation: 'No, he'll slip on the wood floors with socks on.') Childcare worker: "Are you sure his feet won't get cold?" (Translation: 'Simply tragic, the level of care this child is receiving.') Me: "No, he's barefoot all the time at home. He'll be fine." (Translation: 'Seriously lady? It's not even cold in here.') Childcare worker: "Ok, well, do you have a bottle or special snack for him?" (Translation: 'I bet he hasn't had breakfast yet') Me: "No, he should be good, he just had breakfast." (Translation: 'Back off, lady') Childcare worker: "Are you SUUUUUuuurrrreee? An hour is a long time for a little guy!" (Translation: 'Social Services, here I come!') Me: "I'm suuuuurrreeee." (Translation: 'Lady, although I would like nothing better than to punch your face, I want to take advantage of the free childcare you are providing, so I'm gonna let the attitude slide. For now.") Me: "Have fun, buddy!" (Translation: 'Pull the crazy lady's hair!') Childcare worker: "Oh, we certainly will!" (Translation: 'I think there's an extra pair of socks around here somewhere...')